The year I was learning to cope, one day and one child at a time, and discovering that moving forward didn't mean leaving the memories behind.
2026 Me
~06 JANUARY 2015 ~
Daddy, I am missing you so much, and still don't know how to cope up - you, not being physically present with me.
But God has a reason and I just have to accept it. I am blessed to know in faith that you are in the loving arms of God. I know you will watch over me and our children and you will pray for us.
You will forever live in my heart.
Dear old me,
Eight days. That’s how soon after Rey’s passing you wrote this. Reading it now, I can feel how much you were hurting.
But even then, you were trying to hold on to what you knew in faith. You didn’t know what the years ahead would look like. You only knew that you had to take the next step.
From 2026, I realize… you did.
~ 20 JANUARY 2015 ~
Natatandaan mo ito Daddy?
Jan. 19, 2014. Birthday ni Ning.
Pugtong-pugto ang mata ko dahil sa “nang-away” sa akin.
Ipagdasal mo ako dyan—that I will be able to completely forget that “instance” in my life.
Ikaw ang kakampi ko.
Your words, assurance and embrace made me whole.
Nagawa mo pang pasayahin ang gabing yun para kay Ningning...
Loveyou!
Dear old me,
I may no longer remember all the details of that instance. But I remember how Rey made you feel: safe, and never alone.
Maybe that's what mattered most. 💙
~ 29 MARCH 2015 ~
Yeye and Tenten enjoying their talents (mana sa yo Daddy)...
Dear old me,
And apparently, Daddy's talents didn't leave with him. 💙
~ 08 APRIL 2015 ~
Kanya lahat yang nasa table!
Wala siyang kasalo!
Nagutom daw sa kaka-aral...
Dear old me,
You enjoyed watching your children. Yeye had her priorities straight: study hard, eat harder. 😂
~ 09 MAY 2015 ~
Date with Noknok... Yung ang daming napagkwentuhan.
Dear old me,
Look at the two of you. Noknok had the time to date you. 😉Now, he's busy with work and growing family.
I hope Noknok and I can do this again—just the two of us, too. 🙏
~ 30 JUNE 2015 ~
First painting of Yeye on canvas using acrylic paint.
Daddy is happy and proud of you, I'm sure!
Favorite color pa niya ang green. 😊😍
Dear old me,
Daddy's hand. Yeye's hand. His favorite color. 💚Precious!
~ 05 AUGUST 2015 ~
Congratulations Yeye! Anong say ng mga kuyas and ate? Ang tuwa ni Daddy nyan. Marunong na mag-drive ang bunso nya!
Dear old me,
You were still telling Daddy about his children. Even then. 💙
~ 07 OCTOBER 2015 ~
Dati sunod ako nang sunod kay Reynaldo pag nandito kami.
Ngayon sunod ako nang sunod kay Reynalda...
Parehong-pareho! 😂
Dear old me,
Daddy may have left...the business, but apparently he left his management style behind. 😂
~ 15 OCTOBER 2015 ~
I found myself crying a lot more. But, not out of sadness, but because of so many happy and good memories. MEMORIES ARE FOREVER!
Ibig sabihin, ok lang pag umiiyak ako!
Dear old me,
You were learning such a beautiful truth back then. Tears aren't always a sign of pain; sometimes, they are just gratitude overflowing.
Eleven years later, I am still okay when I cry. Those memories are still safe, and God’s grace is still keeping me whole.
~ 17 NOVEMBER 2015 ~
“Ningning, SI DADDY KA BA???” Di ko alam kung magagalit ba ako o hindi.
Yung kapag tumitingin at bumibili kami ni Ningning ng materyales para sa project namin, lagi kami nagtatalo. Pero palagi siya nananalo. Nung kay Daddy, wala din ako panalo. Pangit daw ng taste ko! Hahaha.
Yung ang daming Reynaldo sa buhay ko! Noknok, Tenten, Yeye!
Dear old me,
Daming Reynaldo nga. And I wouldn't have it any other way. 💙
~ 05 DECEMBER 2015 ~
When Saturday becomes so gloomy and you're driving back home at minimum speed because you're crying. You stopped to write this.
Dear old me,
That was twenty four days to go. I knew exactly how you felt, my old self. 🥹
